At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys’ side of the story. (I must admit, it’s pretty good.)

We always hear “the rules” From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!
Please note… These are all numbered “1″ ON PURPOSE!

1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It’s like the full moon
Or the changing of the tides.
Let it be..

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That’s what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are..
Don’t ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the
ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done,
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a
fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. And chartreuse, forget it!!!!!

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” we will act like
nothing’s wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an
answer you don’t want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
fine…Really.

1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared
to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
Or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping.

IF ONLY GUYS KNEW...

That it doesn't take much to piss a girl off (all it takes is a small amount of insensitivity, male pride, and chauvinism).
That it doesn't take much to make a girl melt either.
That good looks aren't always that important - it's a sense of humor and his being really easy to talk to that count the most. (can the guys say the same? I wonder...)
That there may be lots of fish in the sea, but you can't get them all at once at the same time.
That guys are also incomprehensible/abstruse to girls as girls are big mysteries to guys.
That when a girl is friendly with a guy or she actually talks to a guy, it doesn't mean she likes him.
That when a girl is seen alone with a guy, it does NOT mean that SHE likes HIM!
That girls just wanna have fun. (hey now...hey now...)
That sometimes they (guys in general) are really quite insensitive.
That guys and girls can be just FRIENDS and not necessarily MORE than that.
That girls don't really appreciate being called 'babe' or 'chio bu' or 'chicababes' in their presence.
That it's not entirely easy for girls to 'reject' guys.
That it's not the guy's fault when he's rejected.
That when a girl says NO; By golly, she MEANS it!
That it's not a girl's fault if she's not automatically perfect--meaning, so what if she's horizontally challenged!
That it's a fact of life for guys to mature at least three years behind girls. (hey, girls DO mature faster than guys do!)
That most of the time (actually, ALL the time), girls really appreciate it when guys act like gentlemen - the opening-of-car -doors and the ladies-first thing.
That certain girls are acutely aware when guys are teasing each other about certain girls (especially when those 'certain girls' are right there).
That the smell of sweat mixed with Tommy or Polo Sport isn't exactly considered 'sexy'.
That it's really impolite to stare at girls no matter how sexy or skinny they are (hey, you don't see girls openly staring at guys! There is such a word as SUBTLETY!)
That it doesn't take two minutes for a girl to look beautiful - it takes a much longer period of time (admit it, it's worth the wait!)
That when girls act really bitchy, it's just one of them days... (girls,you know what I mean! it's gotta be that specific time the month!)
That even if girls don't say anything when they're with guys, it doesn't mean that they don't know anything (or don't LISTEN).
That if you can make a girl laugh, you are 'in'. Girls would rather spend their time laughing and talking to an ugly guy rather than bear with a non-interesting, pea-brained, humorless.
That when guys talk, girls listen, and when the girls talk, they expect the same amount of interest and attention.
That there are just some cases when guys are perceived as friends only and unwelcomed lovers.
That if guys can turn off their emotions like faucets, girls CAN'T.
That when guys say they'll call, they'd better.
That tardiness doesn't exactly make a good impression on girls.
That it's impossible for girls to go to the ladies' room alone-they have to go in little groups (now, don't ask why... they just HAVE to).
That smoking is tolerable, but continuous smoke being blown in your face isn't!
That when guys act like gays (as in joke around), girls get chills down their spines even if it is all fake (pity jack neo!)
That they dig their own graves when they make insensitive remarks to girls.
That even when guys act like complete assholes, girls almost always end up forgiving them (it's what you call 'compassion'). But, forgiveness isn't that easy you know. You gotta go through that 'down on bended knees' thing.
That maybe it's about time that guys wrote a list about the things they wish gals knew......

If ONLY GALS KNEW

that guys can also be sensitive and caring too.
that when a guy likes a girl, that girl need not be pretty, but just also has things in common with him.(then there will be things to talk about)
that most of the time, the guys dun really know how girls really feel
that guys can 100% cope with rejection (like real)
that guys try to show off chauvinism to try to please the girl( of course it does not work!)
that guys are born with a mutual attraction to girls ( that's why they stare at chio bu!)
that most guys are rather hesitant when it comes to asking a girl out.
that the only reason why some guys try to look like AH bengs is to try to impress girls!
that when a guy says see first, it most of the time means a NO.
that when a guy tries to be direct in conversation, is becos his trying to be honest and hopes the gal understands the real meaning!
that desperate guys mostly come from boys schools.
that its natural for a guy to be jealous (especially she mentions the name of another guy often!)
that guys cannot get info of girls in the library! sometimes guys also need to know more about how to deal with girls, becos we were not born with it.
that no matter how a guy flirts, he has one girl friend, all the rest are just friends!
that when guys find god sisters, it does not mean they like them, they just want to have comunication with girls.
that when a guy looks at a girl's chest, u got to forgive him!
that when a couple breaks, the guy also feels upset, it just that he does not show it in public
that if a girl is interested in a guy, she should give a hint!
that it is very embarassing for a guy to be unable to help a girl.
that no guy is 100% perfect no matter how they look, so girls, dun have such high expectations!